Last Family Dinner For Dying Grandpa Turns Into Disaster As Homophobic Aunt Decides To Shoot Jabs At Niece's NB Partner

"I was just sick of every one of their jabs at my life"

Maryjane

• Published in Interesting
• January 24, 2024

At some point in some of the adult people's lives, they will likely have disagreements with their parents. However, if their family members don't accept their gender identity or sexual orientation, members of the LGBTQ+ community may experience additional problems.

Religious beliefs, racial and ethnic identities, social standards that they maintain, and even systemic racism may shape the opinions of these our family members. This may lead them to an attempt to control and dominate LGBTQ+ people through unpleasant comments and actions.

The OP comes from a strictly Christian household that is not very accommodating to change or difference. The OP and lots of her cousins have identified with the LGBTQ+ community.

So it makes family gatherings awkward as the older members do not care for them the same way they care for the straight-gender kids. OP's grandfather was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer, and the doctors told him he had only 3 months to live.

OP's parents and her grandmother planned a get-together dinner for all their family so her grandfather could see everyone one last time. It turned out to be a bad idea, as dinner turned chaotic after OP's homophobic aunt decided to bring up talks about her partner while they were eating.

The OP ended up lashing out at them, and her grandfather was shocked but angry at her outburst. Read the entire story in full as you scroll down below.

OP writes

OP's grandpa could never understand why they would do ‘this’

Then, OP's grandpa starts questioning her

The OP would not be attending her grandfather's funeral as well

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the AH:

(1)telling my mom that I would not attend her dying father funeral (2) I told her right after the dinner situation and I don’t know if I was acting too harshly, she is a single mother and I’m her only child she needs my support too.

And the comments from other Redditors roll in...

The OP shouldn't blame herself

OP's aunt ruined it all

OP's mom needs her support

The OP drops more details in the comments

My family is quite toxic as you can tell so I know my mother has been taught to not fight back in these situations. She’s in therapy now and is unlearning a lot of this, I just want to be there for her during this time. I know it is hard for her to grieve for a person who hurt her and know the way she grew up damaged her and her perspective.

Set boundaries that protect you

OP's mom doesn't get it

They don't deserve access to the OP's life

OP's vindictive aunt brought it up

Hurtful language is sometimes used on gay people which is any sort of harassment or abuse, such as not respecting pronouns, shaming, embarrassing, or threatening with physical or verbal harm. LGBTQ+ individuals may encounter additional sorts of discrimination or obstacles while attempting to get support.

The OP wasn't going to take it which is why she poured out her mind. It might not have been the best decision but she was declared not the AH.

Maryjane