Wife Hurts Husband's Feelings With Refusing To Host His Permissive Sister And Her Undisciplined Kids For Weekend
A Redditor felt ill at ease at the prospect of playing gracious host to her sister-in-law's family. She told her husband she didn't want to spend a weekend cleaning after his chaotic nieces.
OP's husband didn't appreciate how she viewed his sister and her family. OP's sister-in-law has three children, one of whom was an 8-month-old baby.
Meanwhile, OP and her husband chose to be child-free. Having no children meant it was OP and her husband who made the monthly 3-hour drive to visit his family.
His parents, his sister, and her family have also visited where OP and her husband lived. The few hours OP spent observing how her husband's nieces behaved in their house were enough to discourage her from spending prolonged periods with the kids.
OP expected her sister-in-law to rein her children in because they were visitors to another person's house. Her husband's sister did nothing as her kids alternated from playing on the stairs, jumping on pieces of furniture, and dragging their dirty hands on every surface.
OP knew that was how children behaved. What infuriated her was her sister-in-law's and her husband's attitude about the entire thing.
They didn't once stop the kids from doing whatever they wanted, no matter how disruptive and disrespectful it was. They gave whatever their children demanded as soon as a tantrum started.
So, OP immediately refused when her husband said he wanted his parents and his sister's family to spend the weekend at their house.
u/SierraNancyOP said she was okay with her husband's parents visiting, but she couldn't allow his sister and her kids to spend the weekend.
u/SierraNancyOP likes her sister-in-law and her husband, but she didn't appreciate their parenting style.
u/SierraNancyShe wasn't planning on banning them from her house forever, but she thought it wiser to wait until all three kids were better behaved.
u/SierraNancyIt's time for OP to establish her boundaries of her own.
KasparianIf her husband insists on having his nieces over, he should be in charge of clearing up all the messes they are sure to make.
SimmingPandaKids will want to do things they shouldn't until they learn why they shouldn't. It's their parents' responsibility to teach them.
Nervous_Hippo8855
If OP can't reason with her husband, she could easily make herself scarce during the weekend of his family's visit.
FuzzyMom2005
Since her sister-in-law sees no issues with how her children behave, OP needs rules of her own to protect her house from being destroyed.
little_pinata
It's only natural for her husband to be defensive of his sister's children, but he also needs to acknowledge the facts that OP laid out for him.
SnooChickens2457
OP can follow in the footsteps of this wise Redditor.
ExampleLow4715
She could give her husband the chance to clean up after his nieces and see how much he enjoys it.
External-Hamster-991
Unless OP's sister-in-law and her husband open their eyes to what they are doing to their children, it's unlikely that their behavior will improve.
Dogmother123
OP "won" in the end because her in-laws visited without the kids.
SierraNancy
OP did not explain how that came to be. We are in the dark if OP's husband spoke to his sister and if OP's feelings towards the children's undisciplined behavior affected her relationship with her sister-in-law.
Her sister and brother-in-law may not know it yet, but they are carving a challenging future for themselves and their children. Spoiled kids aren't exactly set to grow up to become well-adjusted adults.
