Man Helps Older Sister Find The Courage To Leave Her Abusive Husband And Cut Ties With Their Conservative Family
Walking the tightrope between letting your adult siblings fight their own battles and intervening on their behalf is a tough balancing act. A 32-year-old OP adhered to the first option for a few years until several distressed calls from his only sister.
OP and his family grew up working class. His two older brothers were minded by their conservative relatives while their parents were working to make ends meet.
By the time OP and his older sister were born, their parents were well off. They grew up with the more liberal ideals of their father.
OP and his sister both got their Master's degrees. Their older brothers didn't go to college despite the opportunities to do so.
OP and his sister went back to their hometown when their father died. Since then, OP has maintained limited contact with his family, but his sister moved back to their town.
She married the religious guy their mom spent years setting her up with. She left her career in New York City and surrendered all of her savings to her new husband.
OP and his sister reconnected in 2020 when she called him out of the blue. In 2021, their mom informed OP that his sister is pregnant and planning to be a stay-at-home mom.
OP probed his sister about her plans until she broke down and confessed what had happened to her all these years
u/aita112022Her husband is abusive. She is broke and their family hasn't been helpful.
u/aita112022Their oldest brother even told her to stop feeling special because his wife also went through a similar thing
u/aita112022Her husband kicked her out of their house for questioning him about her money when she called OP in 2020
OP couldn't help it and yelled at his sister as well. He told her that all is not lost because she still has the chance to change her life and he promised to help her move back to New York if that was what she wanted.
u/aita112022He sent her $5k the following day no questions asked after she called him. A month later, she is filing for divorce and has moved back to New York to start a new job. Their family thinks this is all OP's fault.
u/aita112022There is no doubt that OP saved his sister from living a life in isolation and fear
HereWeGo_SteelersOP has to realize that what he did for his sister was no small thing
aita112022
She will need him now more than ever after spending years in an abusive relationship
CatteHerder
OP reassured Redditors that he is communicating with his sister regularly
aita112022
Redditors cautioned him against what the abusive husband might do now that OP's sister is no longer under his control
mecha_face
It's OP's house and since they don't consider him their family, they have no right to live in his home
Avebury1
It's good that OP isn't susceptible to their delusion
aita112022
They clearly add no value to OP's life and actually cause more harm than good
LadyAnput
They will definitely try to manipulate his sister again and OP has to watch out for that just in case
LadyAnput
No wonder OP was in shock during the wedding
aita112022
She was grieving the death of their father when the manipulation began. They preyed on her while she was vulnerable.
LadyAnput
OP's reassurance to his sister that he will be there for her no questions asked was what she needed to find the courage to leave her abusive situation
LadyAnput
I'm so curious about OP's childhood because of this comment
aita112022
That was a terrifying thing to say casually
DubiousPeoplePleaser
They have each other, that's what matters.
Different-Secret
OP is an incredible brother. His unwavering reassurance, despite the yelling delivery, woke his sister up to her reality.
OP has to keep an open line of communication with her just to make sure that there is nothing amiss. We wish them both a lovely life away from their manipulative families.
