Newlywed Wife Opts To Spend Christmas With Son And Parents, Excluding Her Husband And Leaving Him Alone

"I'm not leaving him behind because we did not have any plans for Christmas."

Filip

• Published in Interesting
• December 2, 2023

Christmas is one of the most important holidays of the year. People like to gather with their family and friends to celebrate it, to use an opportunity to spend some relaxing and pleasant time together.

But, as much as the holiday has the same meaning for everyone, some people overlook their closest family members and decide to celebrate it only according to their preference. A similar issue happened in this story, too.

The OP explained she met her husband, Philip, two years ago, and they married four months ago. The OP is a mother to a 10-year-old son, Billy, from a previous relationship, and the ex-partner is not involved in their lives.

But, the OP's husband has a strained relationship with her family. One incident involved a disagreement with the OP's father, who accused Philip of keeping Billy away from them.

But Philip denied this, explaining he was busy working while the OP was ill. Another major argument occurred when Philip, a pediatrician, argued with her mother and sister over their preference for natural treatments, leading to him being unwelcome at her parents' house.

Recently, the OP received a Christmas invitation from her family, including herself and Billy, but excluding Philip. Since she expected Philip to be excluded, she decided to attend.

However, upon learning this, Philip reacted strongly, feeling betrayed that she would accept an invitation that didn't include him. He perceived it as her choosing her family over their own, especially during Christmas.

The OP told him she couldn't dictate her family's guest list, and since they had no plans for Christmas, she decided to go with her son. But Philip believed it was a matter of principle and respect and that she shouldn't let him spend Christmas alone.

He said she was contributing to his alienation from her family. The OP explained that her family was used to spending the holidays with Billy.

And with her husband's expectations, she feels pressure from both sides.

Here is the OP's issue:

The OP said she married a great man:

But his relationship with her family is strained:

Several arguments led to Philip no longer being welcome in her parents' home:

So, her family invited her to Christmas without Philip, and she accepted it:

But Philip got offended as he thought they should celebrate the holiday together as a family:

He said the OP hurt him for choosing her family over their own:

The OP explained she feels pressure from both sides:

A Redditor told the OP that married couples are expected to celebrate Christmas together

Another Redditor confirmed that the OP was in the wrong

The OP's husband is poorly treated by her family, and she allows it

One Redditor tried to explain it simply to the OP

"This will be your first Xmas as a married couple"

A Reddit user was curious why the OP didn't stand up for her husband

She should be mad at her parents for excluding her husband

If her husband is banned, she shouldn't go either

"What exactly is their problem with him?"

The OP needs a reality check

Many families spend Christmas just opening presents and spending the day together

She should have made plans just for the three of them

"I can’t believe you are so shocked that he has presumed you would spend Christmas together."

Redditors told the OP that her husband was right for expecting to spend Christmas together as a family. He also has the right to be mad at her for allowing her parents to exclude him.

The OP should reconsider her priorities if she wants to stay in a marriage because it's obvious that she has no respect for her husband.

Filip