New Mom Is In Serious Need Of A Break And Wants To Directly Ask Her In-Laws Since Her Husband Is Mincing Words, Seeks Advice To Proceed

If they wanted to come see their grandkids, they would"

Maryjane

• Published in Interesting
• November 19, 2023

A parent's job is tough. In the process of loving your children and ensuring their safety and well-being, you sacrifice everything.

It's possible that you'll have days when you get less sleep. You might not even have any alone time, and you long to spend time with adults.

"Is it okay to take a break from my children?" is a question that every parent has questioned themselves about at some point. It can seem impossible to manage the demands of work, kids, and everything else on a daily basis.

So the answer is yes; giving yourself some time is beneficial for both you and your kids. Supporting them is much simpler when you've had a brief physical and emotional break.

Needing time for oneself is not a sign of weakness, shame, or lack of affection. When we have given ourselves the best care possible, we are best able to care for others.

It is very possible to need a break and be a loving, present parent at the same time. After all, being human entails wanting space from your kids, and taking breaks is essential.

The narrator of today's story needed a break and help so badly that she didn't mind talking to her in-laws about it. Her in-laws sold their home 3.5 hours away and purchased a home 1.5 hours away under the veil of being closer to them.

Not just that, they wanted to be more actively involved grandparents to their two children, but they never visited. Read the full story for yourself below.

Any parent would understand that the OP and her husband are surviving, not necessarily thriving

Some extra hands to help with the baby and entertain the toddler would be really wonderful

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a-hole:

I feel like I would be the a-hole for intervening between my husband and his parents. That I may be crossing a line. I also feel that I may be opening a can of worms by creating confrontation with them and putting us further than we already are with getting help but upsetting them.

The comments roll in...

The in-laws aren't obligated to help

The OP's not entitled to anything

It's the OP's responsibility

The OP added an additional context saying:

We have both had several mental breakdowns in the last few weeks from over stress, frustration, and exhaustion. My family lives 1500 miles away. We could hire a sitter, or a doula. But this is enmeshed with my husbands desire for his parents to be more actively involved in our kids lives.

They shortened the commute

Using them for free labor

Hiring a babysitter

It's time to hire help

You are less likely to be the involved, attentive, and fun parent your child needs and deserves if you don't get the sleep you require. Setting boundaries with your kids is beneficial for both you and them.

The majority of Redditors were of the opinion that the OP is the AH. Leave your thoughts about this story in the comments section below and share as well.

Maryjane