Man Breaks Down In Tears And Cries Foul As Ailing Mom Gives Younger Sibling Power Of Attorney

“My older brother never respects our mother’s wishes. So, she chose me.”

Jesse

• Published in Interesting
• February 15, 2024

Meet a trio of brothers—our 33-year-old narrator (Original Poster), along with Matt and Frank, his elder brothers. This journey began with their mother's declining health—she’d just been diagnosed with early-onset dementia.

Things were even more complicated, considering their dad passed away a while back. They had some tough choices ahead, including legally assigning someone to make choices in their mother’s stead—cause the worst was yet to come.

Frank’s distance ruled him out, so it all boiled down to OP and Matt now. The mother laid out plans to divert her husband’s sizable life insurance policy to an in-home aide—under no circumstances did she want to leave her home.

OP listened attentively and promised to follow through, but Matt? He saw things differently. He deemed the whole plan unnecessarily expensive—a nursing home was more reasonable, in his opinion.

But that wasn’t the only issue the brothers found themselves at odds with. They clashed severally due to conflicting thoughts on their mother’s wishes, and well, OP’s mom had seen enough. 

She entrusted OP with a power of attorney but urged the brothers to keep it from Matt to avoid further discord.

Fast forward three years, and their mom's condition took a severe nosedive. Matt began pushing for a care facility once again till OP could bear it no more—he made it clear it wasn’t up to Matt to decide and pulled out the legal documents that granted OP power of attorney.

This surprise revelation left Matt wounded and questioning his place in the family hierarchy. But was OP wrong to reveal the truth prematurely, or was it the only way to protect his mother's wishes? 

The story in detail

A bit of background

Their mom ended up choosing OP over Matt as her Power Of Attorney. This was because OP was the most respectful of her choices. But she wanted this kept a secret

Matt found out years later when their mom’s health had deteriorated. This left him in tears, causing a new problem for the family

“NTA. was going to come out eventually and your brother is only looking out after his own interests.“

“NTA. Your mom picked you for a reason, don’t let her down.“

“NTA. Since you have power of attorney, I'd limit Matt's visits to mom unless you are present.”

“Right now your mother is doing well. I think Matt is just being greedy. Contact a lawyer to see if you can limit his visits.”

“His behavior is proving her decision to name you right and I’d tell him that.”

“NTA - But your mom didn't do herself or you any favors by avoiding this conversation with Matt.”

“Tell Matt exactly why his Mom didn't want him involved in the decision making and stand your ground.”

“NTA Your brother is so upset because he wants the inheritance.”

Redditors urged OP to quit the self-blame. The truth was going to come out eventually, and this was as good a time as any. 

Many pointed out how Matt’s motives seemed more about preserving the estate for his personal interest than his mother’s well-being—the hypocrisy was glaring.

The consensus? If Mom can afford it, she deserves to stay home. Don’t let Matt’s tantrum cloud your judgment.

What do you think about this story? Let us know in the comments.

Jesse